Things to write about...

I have Facebook account where I share my whereabouts with my friends. I limit my visit to FB nowadays because my dear hubby dislikes seeing me chatting away and not doing my work esp not working on the thesis. I rarely blog now that I have so much to think about on work and housework.

 

The last entry was about BPA baby bottles that I am selling. Many events happened after May 14^th, 2009 that I could not cope to write about. I should write on my Bakun’s experience – working on Sunday till nighttime at the dam’s construction site covered with dust particles all over. I should write on numerous wedding receptions that I went with my kids, while my husband is working, to fix that kids’ enthusiasm with ‘pengantins’ obsession, free lunch and to accommodate the fact that we have less money to spend on paid-outings. I should write on how we took almost two-weeks off to take care of the children during mid-term break (but I still work nigh time to finish up the data analysis). I should write on the event that I almost cried when the bank turned off my personal loan application just because my ‘gold’ was not a ‘solid gold’ – and that time I only had few cents in my purse and nothing in my bank account. I should, at least, write about my failure to provide birthday cakes for my younger daughter and husband on their birthdays because I only have enough notes last for a week but the payday was two weeks away. Nevertheless, on happier note, I should write on the latest event that I went on stage for half an hour, first time in my working career, stumbled with the laser pointer, had to depend solely on printed slides because the projector screen was exactly beside me and I am too short to peek above the podium, but the people loves listening to my presentation (awesome!) and they said I looked damn confident on stage and acted professionally when things went wrong.

 

Sometimes, I do feel that even though I am working as an engineer, I am never more fortunate that the people living on streets. I am never rich. I barely survived with the current income. I sell things to make ends meet. I am just lucky that I have a job to feed the kids, to pay for – house loan, car loan, computer loan etc. I live on loans; nothing is mine, literally. Other people don’t know that we are suffering because we never tell anyone except to each other. Till now, I don’t know whether my decision to return home was a correct decision. I just hope that we will survive, once again, through the bad financial situation we are having now. Insyaallah. Amiiinn..